Wednesday, December 16, 2015

This Is The Most Disturbing Kid's Book Of All Time

The 1975 book How A Baby Is Made doesn't leave out any disturbing details.

Never judge a book by its cover.

 

It starts out innocently enough.

"It begins when a man and a woman find love, despite their horrendous fashion choices."

 

Then things get a little more NSFW.

"The man and the woman strip down, but stay in the same awkward back patting pose."

Things get very NSFW during the insemination.

"The man releases four cartoonishly large sperms into the woman's lady balloon while they breathe into one another's mouths. Neither of them so much as blinks."

 

Time to cuddle standing up!

"Just like an olive in a martini glass, the zygote floats aimlessly."

 

Now back to this pose, still naked.

Hey bro, if the fetus is the size of a cocktail shrimp, you can probably put your pants back on.

 

After 9 pantsless months, the baby is almost ready.

Danny DeVito?

 

At least they get dressed to go to the hospital.

What a couple of hippies.

 

Once there, they visit the doctor from Human Centipede.

 

Then the birthing process be—OH MY GOD!

Have fun trying to sleep tonight! (Also, why is the doctor at that end of the bed holding something that looks like a hammer? No anesthesia?)

 

Ta-daaaa!

"Why won't you love me?"

 

Mommy loves her bizarrely alert and fingerless newborn.

Looks suspiciously like the doctor, to be honest.

She Looks Sweet But You Should See Her Next Selfie


This girl kinda looks like she was hangin’ out, having a great time, being herself, when all of a sudden a giant animal took a poop on her shoes. And she’s like… NOOOOOOOOOO.



Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Husband Opens Box Thinking It’s An Apple Watch, But What’s Inside Makes Him Cry


Who wants an Apple watch for their birthday?

How about for Christmas? Or Valentine’s day? Any of the above would work for me, if I’m being honest. I mean come on, those things are awesome.

To wear it is to love it.

Or so they say. I mean, once I saw these little babies hitting the shelves I must say, I couldn’t help but believe it. It has some amazing features that even the most technically challenged individual would get excited about. You can receive and respond to your notifications in seconds, track your daily activity (like how many steps you’ve taken, and a bunch of other really cool things). You can have and play music from it, using just your voice! (Is that for real? How cool!) You can also pay for stuff too, like groceries or cool fitness gear, whatever you want. All of these incredible features in one tiny little watch. It still blows my mind what technology is able to do.
This guy wanted an Apple watch. He really wanted an Apple watch. And he thought he was getting one. (I mean, she did hand him an Apple watch box, so it’s a little unfair).
He didn’t get an Apple watch. He got the furthest thing from it. When he opens the box and realizes there is no Apple watch inside he begins to cry, but wait until you see why he’s crying! He may not have gotten an awesome watch, but what he did get is much more amazing. His reaction is beautiful. Not only is his woman a genius for the way she gives him this incredible gift, she also knows how to build some suspense. This video is one of the sweetest and most emotional I’ve seen in a long time. What a happy surprise!

Watch it here:

17 Most WTF Photoshop Fails Of 2015 That Should Have Never Made It to the Internet

2015 was a great year for Photoshop flops. 
We had some angry celebrities, some strangely-shaped Victoria's Secret models, and some human barbies. 
There's something for everyone! Check out the worst examples of art and advertising gone wrong this year: 
1. This mysterious case of a disappearing butt cheek
2. And this case of disappearing nipples 
3. Lindsay Lohan's failed attempt at giving herself a butt in an Instagram photo
4. Jeb Bush's hand that seems to have darkened by a few shades

A Husband Divorced His Wife After Looking Closer

However, he took a closer look and saw something that would change their lives forever. Do you see it?

However, he took a closer look and saw something that would change their lives forever. Do you see it?
If not, you'll definitely see it in the next picture.

How about now?

How about now?
Yikes. I think you can guess how this one ends.

A man, whom the wife was cheating with, was hiding under the bed the entire time. The husband didn't see it until he looked at t

A man, whom the wife was cheating with, was hiding under the bed the entire time. The husband didn't see it until he looked at t
The husband, after confronting her with proof beyond the shadow of a doubt, filed for divorce. No word on what came of The Man Under The Bed. But he should probably not peek next time.

Monday, December 14, 2015

16 Celebrities You Didn’t Know Are Gay

16 Celebrities You Didn’t Know Are Gay

Hollywood is a pretty fickle place and, if celebrities come out of the closet, there’s an unfortunate possibility that their careers can be negatively affected.

Consequently, many stars seem to take the subtle route instead of shouting from the rooftops that they are in fact gay! We have compiled a list of 16 celebrities you probably didn’t know were gay!
1. Sarah Paulson
Sarah Paulson, from “American Horror Story,” came out when she and her girlfriend at the time Cherry Jones declared their love for each other in an interview with Velvetpark at Women’s Event 10 for the LGBT Centre of NYC back in 2007.
After her break up with Jones, Paulson has said that she is open to relationships with women and men.
2. Sean Hayes
Sean Hayes, best known for his role as Jack on “Will and Grace,” came out in 2010.
The actor has said that he avoided coming out for many years because he didn’t want to jeopardize his chance of landing straight roles and he recently said that the controversy over his “Will and Grace” character being too gay made him retreat back into the closet!
The actor now feels as though he owes the gay community an apology for coming out too late.
3. Chely Wright
In 2010, Chely Wright became the first country music star to publically come out as a lesbian.
Wright married Lauren Blitzer in 2011 and, in 2013, the couple announced that they are expecting twins!
The country singer is quite happy to be out.
“I don’t have the words to describe the freedom and the lightness and the reckless abandon with which I want to live my life,” Wright said in an interview with CBC’s Q cultural affairs show.
4. Michael Stipe
Questions about Michael Stipe’s sexuality have been swirling since the ’90s when he admitted to having relationships with both men and women.
Stipe also revealed that he was in a committed relationship with a man.
The former lead singer of R.E.M. prefers to describe himself as “queer” as opposed to “gay.”
“I think there’s a line drawn between gay and queer, and for me, queer describes something that’s more inclusive of the grey areas.”
5. Ian McKellan
Ian McKellan – best known as Gandalf from “Lord of The Rings” – came out in 1988.
Although he has been living openly and proudly as a gay man, he does regret not coming out sooner.
6. David Hyde Pierce
After years of refusing to talk about his personal life, David Hyde Pierce finally came out in 2007.
The actor, who is best know for his role as Niles in “Frasier,” confirmed that he is gay and in a relationship with a writer/producer/director in Hollywood.
7. Matt Dallas
Matt Dallas, from “Kyle XY,” came out in 2013 when he announced via twitter that he is engaged to his boyfriend, Blue Hamilton.
8. Matt Bomer
Matt Bomer – best known for his roles in  “White Collar” and “Chuck” – was not so open about his sexuality for many years.
In 2012, he subtly acknowledged his homosexuality when he thanked his partner and their three children as he received an award from the Desert AIDS Fund.
9. Jonathan Bennett
Jonathan Bennett, who played Lindsay Lohan’s love interest in “Mean Girls, ” is reported to be gay.
Although the actor hasn’t officially admitted that he prefers men to women, he has been linked to another actor who is openly gay, Matt Dallas.
10. Robin Roberts
“Good Morning America” anchor Robin Roberts came out through a Facebook post this past year.
In the post – which is about her battle with cancer – Roberts addresses her long term girlfriend Amber: “I am grateful for my entire family, my long time girlfriend, Amber, and friends as we prepare to celebrate a glorious new year together.”
11. Jim Parsons
In an interview with The New York Times, “The Big Bang Theory” star Jim Parsons revealed that he is gay and in a long-term committed relationship.
Although the actor has not identified who his partner is, there is speculation that it is art director Todd Spiewak who Parsons thanked during his 2010 Emmy Award Acceptance speech.
12. Victor Garber
In 2013, Victor Garber quietly confirmed that he is gay in an interview with “Greg in Hollywood” blogger Greg Hernandez.
When asked about his relationship with Rainer Andreeson, the actor said, “I don’t really talk about it but everybody knows.” Apparently the couple has been together for over 13 years!
13. Zachary Quinto
Zachary Quinto – of “American Horror Story” and “Heroes” – came out as gay in 2011 and he did so to help make others feel safe coming out.
“It wasn’t about formality or stopping rumors because I don’t really pay attention to rumors in the first place.
It was a very specific move that I made because there was a rash of teen suicides at the time [the victims were gay],” Quinto said.
14. Sean Maher
Sean Maher who played a closeted gay man on “The Playboy Club” admitted that he is gay in real life in 2011. The actor has been living with his partner for over a decade and they have adopted two children together.
15.  Sara Gilbert
Sara Gilbert realized that she was gay back in the ’90s when she was filming “Roseanne” and dating Johnny Galecki.
 Even though the actress began dating “Glee” writer-producer Alison Adler back in 2001, she didn’t publicly come out as a lesbian until 2010.
16. Chris Colfer
Chris Colfer came out when he was cast as Kurt Hummel, a delightfully flamboyant gay teen on “Glee.”
According to Colfer, the show has helped parents accept their LGBT kids!
“I’ve gotten letters from parents saying, ‘I wasn’t sure if I was going to be okay with my child being gay, then I watched the episode with Burt and Kurt and it really changed my whole point of view on it.’”

Top 10 Most Ridiculous & Dangerous Teen Trends You Should Never Try

Kids are stupid. 
It’s a fact – their brains just aren’t fully developed yet. That makes them particularly susceptible to peer pressure and fads. 
In this feature, we’ll spotlight the Top 10 most pathologically idiotic teen trends of all time. Compared to these 10, #DontJudgeChallenge and Condom Challenge of 2015 are just way better.
10. Trunking
In many states, kids can't drive with passangers when they first get their driver's license. 
To avoid this, some have come up with the stupid and extremely dangerous idea known as trunking, which means having passangers ride inside the trunk. 
Two teens died this way back in 2005 and California made trunking ilegal... but kids still do it.
9. Getting drunk on hand sanitizer
Hard to believe, but since they have a hard time getting their hands on real alcohol, some teens have been known to turn to hand sanitizer to get drunk. 
Last year, six teenagers ended up in the ER suffering alcohol poisoning after gulping down hand sanitizer in California.
8. Butt chugging
Yes, I guess the photo says it all. As weird as it sounds, some college students think the best and quickest way to get drunk is through their anus! 
Not only is butt chugging totally stupid, but is extremely dangerous!
7. Cinnamon challenge
Although I love all things cinammon, it would never in a million years occur to me that it'd be a good idea to try to swallow a whole spoonful just to see what will happen. 
6. Vodka eyeballing
This one sounds like one of the craziests things I've ever heard. But apparently it's become popular among college students. 
What they do is tilt their head and allow someone to pour a shot of vodka directly onto their eyes. 
This gives them a super quick buszz when the alcohol enters the bloodstream via the veins at the back of the eye. WTH?
5. Car surfing
Kids simply don't get how quickly their lives can end when they do stupid stunts like this one known as car surfing. 
I know that the whole point is to get the rush of doing something dangerous, but if only they knew how dangerous it actually is...
4. Choking game
In case you haven't heard, YouTube is full of videos that pretty much teach teens to do the most outrageous stunts--such as choking themselves to get high. 
For more than one teen, imitating what they see on YouTube has ended up killing them.
3. Salt & ice challenge 
Teens are pressing salt and ice against their skin for as long as they can take the burning pain, which is similar to frostbite. 
Many times, this stupidity leads to severe injuries like the second-degree burns this 12-year-old boy from Pittsburgh sustained on his back last  year. 
2. Rainbow parties
If you're thinking rainbows and unicorns for a child's birthday party, think again! 
Rainbow parties are basically this: girls wear different color lipstick and perform oral sex on one or several guys leaving them with a rainbow of colors.  
1. Condom Snorting
Words cannot describe how disgusting this is. Nor can they explain why in the world someone would think snorting a condom this is a good idea! 
What is wrong with our teens today?